Don't Want to Go Through this Again

Most of you know that we had A LOT of problems with Jeff and Adam stealing while they were growing up. No one could leave a treat out or it would be gone. Then they started sneaking out at night and taking food from the cupboard. Whole boxes of it. We'd also find all kinds of wrappers hidden in their room for food we didn't have around the house, so people were missing a lot of things from their lunches. I always wondered if the kids knew someone took their chips or desserts or if they just thought the parents didn't pack them any.

It progressed to money, iPods, gameboys etc. It's been a long battle.

So when the twins came home and didn't steal, I was very relieved. I could offer them treats since they didn't steal them. That way I got to be the good guy.

But that has all changed very quickly. Kayla would take little trinkets of the girls and mess with them and we'd find them in her bed, but food wasn't an issue. Then last week--the day after Kayla got student of the month, she took her teacher's bag of M&Ms and hid in the bathroom eating them. The following Monday she went into the school during recess, went to a different kindergarten class and hid in there chewing gum from that teacher's desk. She must have just gone scrounging for something because she wouldn't have known there was gum.

We talked about taking other people's things. We talked about how that hurts their feelings and how it feels to have someone else eat your treat. We talked about how stealing makes your heart ugly etc. The next day Kayla took Jessica's M&Ms.


Last night most of us were at church, but the twins were home with Rick. He left the room for a couple of minutes and the twins went straight to the kitchen. Kaleb took two muffins that were set aside for Tyler for later. Kayla ate all the candy off of the gingerbread house. She had already had her share. She ate everyone else's share.

The thing that concerns me most is that they don't feel bad about taking the food. At all. They have lost all privileges for three days but that happened to Kayla last week and obviously it didn't phase her enough to keep from taking things again.

They also will have to play in their rooms for now since they can't be trusted to play in the play area which is right next to the kitchen. There is normally people all over the house, but no one actually sits and supervises them unless we are playing a game, reading books or working on their homework.

I asked Adam and Jeff separately how it felt to watch the twins start a stealing habit. Neither gave me an answer. I am hoping that they as they see the twins make these wrong decisions that they will realize how we felt when they were doing this. The twins haven't taken anything from Jeff and Adam yet though. Well, actually, I think Kaleb has taken Adam's gum before because Adam leaves it laying right on their dresser.

I hope we can get the twin's stealing habit stopped right now before it progresses to the point the boy's did.

We have tried talking to them.
We made Kayla use her money to replace the candy at school.
I will probably have them use their money to replace the gumdrops from the gingerbread house and buy a package of muffin mix. That's how it works in the real world.
They have their own treats. They have their own special stuff.

Anyone have anything that worked for them?