Wednesday, October 19, 2016

Mixed Feelings about Adoption Classes

In Florida, MAPPS has been replaced by Quality Parenting Training. I think it's a better program, and the homework seems better. Haven't really done it, so not sure about that :)
In a way, it's pretty much all review since we've been through MAPPS three times, and we've also been both foster parents and adoptive parents.

The class requirements are that we have to sit in on a court hearing, and we have interview a foster parent about their experiences, talk to the schools about how to enroll a foster child or talk to a doctor's office about whether or not they accept medicaid. Well, we are foster, not adopt, so some of it will be different for us. And we did all the other stuff when we were foster parents in GA, and it can't be that different. But we will do it all anyway.

So far we have gone to four classes, and Rick, Ty and I have all been fingerprinted for our background check. We've talked about the basic stuff--trauma, cultural and racial differences, abuse, etc. 

A few weeks ago, I told one of the caseworkers that we had four older boys we are interested in. She said that since we are looking at older boys who are already in the system, our home study will get done sooner. But then last night when I mentioned to one of the other caseworkers that I hoped the boys we are interested in aren't all chosen by time we get our home study done, she said not to expect anything to happen in a hurry for us because they all have their own caseload of kids they have to get through court. 

I said I was hoping to have a child in the home by summer so that he'd have that time to get used to us before starting school. She said something like "don't count on it."

But I'd really like to transition during the summer when we are doing activities so that he gets to know us through whitewater rafting and tubing rather than having to change schools during the school year and not really having a chance to get to know us first.

If you missed our last post, these are our top choices. We started out with a long list of boys. We aren't supposed to have any more information about them than what is on the website, but someone in the system did us a favor and told us which ones have obvious issues or needs that would make us not the best family for them. Our favorite turned out to be someone who was sexually abused and as a consequence he has some behaviors that make it better for him not to be in a home with younger children. We ended up eliminating 8 boys. One of them was only because he's in Miami and that would be a 12 hour drive one way for visits.

Because it's on the website and you could simply look it up yourself, I'll include what the website says about each.
Christian is a polite, reserved, intelligent young man. His hobbies include video games and playing basketball. His favorite subject is math and hopes to become an Architect. Christian's favorite foods are pizza and chocolate but won't turn down any food offered to him.

 Justin is a fifteen-year-old white male. He is a good kid that gets along with others well. He is shy initially but warms up when he gets to know you. He likes to swim and play video games. He has a long-term goal of joining the Marine Corps. 

 Parris is a talkative and social young man. He is physically active and enjoys yoga and tumbling. He says that he is pretty good at a back handspring. Parris's favorite color is blue and he loves to eat Mexican food. Parris also mentioned that he enjoys attending church. Parris is open to being adopted and wants to be a part of a forever family.

 Antwan is an outgoing teen who describes himself as smart and intelligent but with a playful side. He enjoys making people happy either by making them laugh or cooking them a meal. He is very active and is hoping to join the track team at his school this coming year. Antwan also has a creative side which he exhibits in drama and performing R&B and gospel music. Antwan is looking for a fun and accepting family that will be there for him throughout his life. Antwan has the potential to accomplish so many great things and just needs the love and support of a committed adoptive family. He would be a joyful addition to any family!

The thought of adding one of these boys or a different one to our family both excites and scares me!!


Felicia said...

It is sad that they don't think that you can have a placement by the summer. The system is just too slow. I pray that you get a great fit for your family!

Emily said...

They can say don't count on it, but it is totally feasible. You will have to advocate for yourselves, though. We graduated from our PRIDE training in December, had our home study in hand by the end of February, and had the girls in our home by July. And that was with the extended delay of ICPC. Praying for the right kiddo in God's timing.

Kathy Cassel said...

Thank you Felicia and Emily. Would be nice if God would just post a photo so we knew which would be a great fit...